#self-compassion archivos - The Resilient Human Project

Compassion Vs Empathy

Something that we all have in common with each other is that we all would like to be free of suffering and experience happiness. In spite of these intentions and because of our ignorance, we create suffering in our lives. Compassion is not pity. It is related to empathy but it is different to empathy. Empathy is when we “feel with” a person. We feel in our own bodies their emotional suffering. Empathy is an important facet of our connection with others, but if we stop just with empathy without moving forwards to compassion, two important things can happen. Continued exposure to the suffering of others and empathising, for example…

Three things to take with you into 2019

I respectfully suggest the following three things to increase your experience of equanimity, connection and wellbeing for 2019 and the future. Just Notice: Once upon a time there was a great spiritual teacher famous throughout the world for the peace he transmitted. He had taught for many years but suddenly he found that he had become fashionable and famous ─ two things that held no attraction for him. He simply wanted to teach. He was especially well liked by the more affluent and better educated, fashion-following, young professionals. On this particular night there was great excitement in the auditorium, an air of expectation. All of the most fashionable people were…

Gratitude brings happiness

It is not happiness which brings gratitude; It is gratitude which brings happiness. Amongst the practices and attitudes we can adopt and practice, gratitude is probably the most effective. It might, at first glance, seem soppy or religious. However, science has shown that grateful people are happier. If that isn’t enough, it also reduces harmful stress, improves your immune system, improves your sense of wellbeing, improves relationships, improves quality of sleep and heart health. I have often mentioned the two (principal) parts of the mind: The Rational Mind (ie the “voice” in our head – that constant flow of thoughts) and the Observing Mind – that part of the mind…

The problem with self esteem

Several people have wondered why I insist on the importance of self-compassion over self-esteem. Therefore I share this newsletter I wrote a while back. I recently read an article in the Wall Street journal talking about the death of the self-esteem movement. This is good news. The self-esteem movement started in 1969 when a psychologist, Nathaniel Brandon, identified (wrongly in my opinion) high self-esteem as being the key to success in life. I have been teaching for more than 17 years now that what is far more important than self-esteem is self-compassion. This idea of self-compassion, of being kind to oneself, is as old as meditation itself and very much…

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